8 ways to deal with people who disrespect you.
1. Take A Deep Breath, And Think Before You Speak
Back in my mean days, when someone would be rude to me, my very first thought would be to give it right back to them. It was a terrible mindset, I know. It took me a while to realize this, but taking a moment before you respond to someone who has just been rude to you can make all the difference. Specifically, it could mean the difference between a huge (and likely unnecessary) fight and a fairly civil interaction. What I like to do is physically pause, take a giant deep breath, and clear my mind before moving forward at all.
2. Keep Calm
According to RobertHalf.com — a staffing service company’s blog that offered advice on handling workplace rudeness — you can effectively discourage rudeness by remaining calm and appearing in control on your response(s). That deep breath you already took? It relaxed you a bit, right? Keep that low-key momentum going throughout the interaction.
3. Consider The Other Person’s Point Of View
Keep in mind that it could be the person’s behavior that day, and not the person themselves, that’s causing them to be cranky to you. If you know the person, and are aware that they are not a bad person, consider it situational. Based on the scenario, quickly consider their side of the argument. Is it possible their point is valid as well? Oppositely, if you know this rude person well and this is just how they seem to act every single day, it might be a larger issue for the two of you to work on. We’ll get to that!
4. Consider What The Other Person Might Be Going Through
Sometimes people are rude for a reason other than the exact situation at hand. Maybe they have a parent who’s sick in the hospital, or are currently unable to pay any of their bills, or are going through a nasty divorce. These are all things you might be completely unaware of, but could be eating them up inside, thus their rude behavior. My mom used to tell me, “put yourself in the other person’s shoes” — and this is exactly what she was referring to. Practice empathy here, where possible. Even my man Dr. Phil agrees that it’s extremely important to have empathy when dealing with rude people.
5. Take A Moment To Choose The Right Approach
Take a moment or two to stop and think about the consequences and if it’s worth a dispute. According to WebMD, when dealing with a difficult person, it’s a good rule of thumb to talk things over only if it’s someone you’re close to. Otherwise — if it’s someone you rarely see, or especially someone you might not ever see again, there’s simply no need to pick the situation apart together. Rather, be as kind as possible to them, and move on. If this is someone close to you, though, let’s talk about what the conversation could look like…
6. If You’re Going To Talk It Out, Do So Mindfully
With this person who you’re close with, or someone you have to deal with regularly, it’s best to come to the table with specific examples of how the person has offended you and what you deem the problem to be, according to WebMD. It’s also helpful to outline the things you want to change, as to help make things smoother between you and Madam Rude in the future.
7. Resist Responding To Rudeness With Rudeness
According to RobertHalf.com, responding to the offending person with rudeness — particularly when it comes to workplace interactions — is not going to get you anywhere. In fact, at work, this can lead to trouble for you. Would it really be worth it to be reprimanded by your boss for something you didn’t even initiate? No way! Also, if you don’t allow yourself to get overly worked up, angry or rude, you’ll likely find yourself happier due if only due to your own positive vibes.
8. When All Else Fails, Kill ‘Em With Kindness
It may seem like a phony way to handle it, but it’s better than sparking a huge feud, am I right? According to CNN, your kind attitude in response to them may ultimately improve their attitude in a positive way. Not only will you feel happy and positive, perhaps they will feel happy and positive because of you. Of course, this isn’t foolproof (we all know those extremely cranky Scrooges that wouldn’t crack a smile even if we handed them a million dollars cash), but it’s surely worth a try.
