I caught my husband with my brother’s wife—so I made one switch. At 2 a.m., the hospital called, and what I later found in his safe exposed a far darker secret

shock on the phone, quickly threw on a robe, and asked which hospital they’d been taken to. The nurse at Saint Anthony Medical Center paused awkwardly before explaining that the couple had mistaken a tube of industrial adhesive for a bottle of intimate lubricant, leaving doctors unable to separate them without medical intervention.